Sorry, been busy. Also I quit.

Sorry I haven't added any stories recently. It's two-fold. One, I've been busy with a play, school, and homework. Two, the day of the last post I quit the job so no new stories trickle in. I do still have a few in reserve that I may eventually get around to posting. Thanks for reading.

Big News - I may have been fired...

...also, pretty sure my manager's just a racist bigot. Two very different events but interconnected in his behavior to me, so let's start at the beginning:

Got to work around 10:45 last night following a performance. About a half hour into my shift, a group of four come into the store, wanting to get gum, in particular Stride. I don't have any on my side of the store, so I send them to the other side, they go down the candy aisle and return to my side down the beauty products aisle: going nowhere near the batteries - this will be important.

One of them goes to leave to wait outside the store for her friends. She sets off the alarm. I'm busy with a customer so I just assume someone has grabbed something and run off, but instead she comes up to the register to see what set off the alarm. I ask to see her bag and happen to find a four-pack of batteries with a CVS security tag on them (which says something along the lines of "If found anywhere other than CVS, please call..."). She claims she bought them at a Quik-Trip earlier, but since they have the CVS tag on them she'll pay for them again, rather than be accused of theft. One of her friends immediately corroborates the story and says its stupid to pay for the batteries a second time. They ask if they can get the receipt from their car to sort the mess out. I have seen one store's merchandise at another location so I find it entirely plausible that a QT employee, out of stock of AA batteries would run into a CVS, buy some, and mark them up later at their own store. As I said, they didn't go anywhere near the batteries. And if they were stealing, why come up to the counter and let me search the bag? Why not just keep walking?

Anyway, I call my manager (who for today's blog will be call Douchebag) to get his take. He comes up, I briefly explain what has transpired and he immediately loses shit and starts accusing these four of shoplifting and, while they all calmly try to explain that's not the case, he calls the Tempe police. Even as I'm arguing that they never went near the batteries so his theory is pretty much impossible. BUT, I'm pretty sure he let the fact that these four people happened to be African-American, speak louder than my rational thought or their calm disposition. They, understandably in my opinion, grew weary of trying to convince him and left, leaving their gum and the batteries behind.

Amazingly, Tempe PD showed up within a minute or two and wound up taking my statement. In which I specifically stated I didn't think they did it because, as I've said, none of them WENT ANYWHERE NEAR THE GODDAMN BATTERIES. But Douchebag, blind to anything other than his theory that a CVS security tag could never EVER be found anywhere else, demanded they press charges.

Side note: Douchebag is the same guy who tackled the intoxicated woman a few weeks ago who I truly believe didn't pose a threat at all. That's assault Douchebag and I would really love it if she pressed charges against you.

Anyway, I pretty pissed off at what I perceived to be entirely a racist move on his part. Combine that with the fact that I recently learned that Douchebag and the other supervisor have had me doing what is supposed to be their job SINCE I STARTED, I finally decided to take a stand. I wouldn't be facing/cleaning his aisles anymore. I wouldn't stock the cooler anymore. And I would stock merchandise. I am a cashier. I get paid to be a cashier. As it is, I am also expected to face/clean my aisles in the store, whereas the day shift is not. Yet we're all paid the same. Probably largely because the store has such poor turnover and they can't keep anybody long anyway. Have I mentioned that I'm the senior cashier after only 5 months (if I don't get fired that is). Which brings me to...

About 5:40AM. I've just covered a break for the new guy. I tell Douchebag, I'm going on break and that while I covered new guy's break, I walked through some of his aisles and Douchebag needs to teach him what facing an aisle is. I go to grab a soda and he tells me to go back through foods because it looks like a mess. I calmly state that it's his aisle. He presses it stating that it's a load-day and so I need to do his aisles to. However, the only other thing I should be doing on a load-day is pulling the ads from this weeks so the day shift can post next weeks ads, which I was doing. Having become fed up with this mentality, I very calmly said something to the effect of "I don't get paid extra to do that," and walked away toward the candy aisle to grab a snack. He paused for a few seconds and followed me to ask, "What did you say?" To which I responded, "I don't get paid to do yours or [other supervisor's] job. I'm a cashier, not a supervisor." And for the second time in the shift he went from 0 to 90 and told me to leave (an hour and a half before my shift was scheduled to end), rather than, say have a rational discussion about where I was coming from or what my concerns were. So I'll be calling the store manager later to see if I still have a job. If not, I'll write up the remainder of backlogged stories and retire this blog. If so, I'm sure the tense work environment will create a whole new batch of Graveyard Shift drama.

I've realized as I wrote this that people may side with Douchebag. And I'm fine with that. I've simply grown tired of working for him. He is, in my opinion, incompetent (did you read the post about the "Do Not Bounce Balls" sign?), lazy (closes the bathroom for about 6 hours a night because he doesn't want to clean it or let the nighttime Mill Avenue crowd use it), and takes an average of 4 or 5 phone calls a night from his family when he should be working. I've never been a fan of working beneath people I feel I'm smarter than, but CVS has taken the cake.

Random - Male Ego-related theft

So a few nights back I came across a couple of pilfered boxes of Extenze. Somebody stole $80 of this male enhancement supplement.

Most likely suspects: a self-conscious guy...or his disappointed girlfriend.

People I Know - Celebrating Obama's commencment speech

So in honor of someone who visited me at work last night, I am remembering the first time they visited me, way back on the night of the Obama commencement speech at ASU. I will not post their name but if he or she wants to claim this story as their own, then be my guest.

First, allow me to briefly describe an old regular of mine (who I'm pretty sure isn't allowed in the store anymore because he was caught panhandling too many times. Anyway, Albert was his name. I first met him, Easter morning. I was on my lunch break picking up some Jack in the Box and he came up to me and the other college kids who had just finished a power hour. He had the bag from a box of wine in one hand and was trying to gather change in the other. He also kept insisting he was a spook in Vietnam, but the dazed look in his eye and wine on his breath didn't add much credibility to his story.

A few days later, he comes into the CVS to buy some liquor. Aaron Neville happens to be playing and he is impressed I know who Aaron Neville. (Side note: Add "I Don't Know Much" to the list of songs I hate hearing every night.)

Anyway, fast forward to the night of the commencement speech when, shortly after 2am, Albert comes in with my unidentified friend. Said friend has apparently been drunkenly discussing Obama with Albert throughout the evening and has arrived at CVS to buy him some smokes. So I ring them up, my friend laughs at how I'll remember the encounter (and Albert) so much better than him tomorrow and I joke that I'll remind him of it on facebook. That interaction may have been the unofficial beginning of what would later become this blog.

So this post is dedicated to you. You know who you are.

Softer Side - Drunken gift.

So I've got a couple of these "Softer Side of CVS things" stored up for when I get a dry spell of funny stories but here's one that happened last night.

A couple of drunk girls came in about 3am for some shopping. And started opening the things they were going to buy, which since they didn't try to leave without paying I'm fine with. Anyway, they finally came up to the register after about 10 minutes of perusing and munching and I started to ring them up. Then they walked back to the other side of the store to get a couple more items while I was in the middle of the transaction. Again, not a problem because there wasn't anyone else in the store so no big deal. They come back with the last couple things and one of the girls says, "Oh crap, I'm really thirsty too."
The other girl replies, "Well what do you want?"
"I don't know, I'm so indecisive. Trevor, what's your favorite drink."
"I'm a Mt Dew guy, I guess," I say.
"Sounds great!" She says and grabs one from the nearby cooler.
I finish ringing them up and they start to leave, leaving the Mt Dew on the counter.
"Don't forget your drink," I say.
They start giggling, "We tricked you. That's for you. Have a great night!" And they left.

My theories: either they felt bad for wandering drunkenly and aimlessly around the store or they were flirting with me. If the latter, they are as bad at it as I am, seeing as they didn't leave me a number or even their names. Oh well. It was a nice gesture, nonetheless.

Quote - ASU Girls

So the quote of the night last night was the following:

"It must be nice with all the scantily clad ASU girls coming in here."

At least three people said this exact same phrase last night.

Character - Cat Lady

So a lady came in last night which pretty much matched to a tee what I imagine when I think of a "Cat Lady" - complete with smelling like a full kitty litter box. Not pleasant.